Joe: A spectacular day.
Tad: It is indeed. Thanks for putting in a good word for me, Dad.
Joe: Well, you and Dixie getting married -- if that doesn't bring out the sun, I don't know what will.
Tad: Yeah.
Jamie: The world's a good place.
Joe: Yeah. Yeah, it is. And your Mom and I couldn't be happier for you.
Tad: Thanks. I'm pretty happy myself.
Joe: And your idea of having it all take place in Kate's garden -- I can't think of two people who belong there more.
Tad: I wish Grandma Kate were here.
Joe: She is.
Jake: Birds are chirping, sun is shining. Beautiful day. Huh?
Joe: We all sleep well, Martin men?
Jake: Oh, yeah.
Jamie: Except for the fact that Uncle Jake snores.
Jake: That wasn't me. That was the bear.
Jamie: What bear?
Jake: The bear that sleeps in the closet, right next to the blue bathroom. You didn't know about that? By the way, I have dibs on the shower in one minute. And you -- I didn't think you were that smart. Dixie's a great woman.

Tad: I think so. Jake: You are, too -- not a woman, but that's all right. I got to go shower.
Tad: Give my regards to your rubber duck.
Jake: She's still not speaking to you.
Joe: My sons, the comedians.
Tad: Back by popular demand.
Jamie: Is it time?
Tad: It is indeed. Put those down. Come on. The gloves?
Jamie here are your gloves. The shovels and buckets are outside.
Joe: Hold on, hold on. What do you mean? What -- buckets and gloves? What's the...?
Tad: Yeah. Jamie bought Dixie and I a tree for our wedding.
Joe: And you intend to plant it here, in the yard?
Jamie: Next to Grandma Kate's garden, near the spot where dad and Dixie are going to get married.
Joe: Today? You're going to plant it today?
Tad: Sure. It's got to be there for the ceremony.
Joe: Ah. Well, you know, Jamie, it's a great idea.
Jamie: Thanks. I picked out the tree myself.
Joe: Right, but listen. You know, wouldn't it be better if you postponed it, did it some other time? We have an awful lot of work to do before, you know, we get ready for the wedding. We do, son.

Adrian: So tell me what to do.
Joe: Yeah, I'm going to tell you. First thing you can do is talk your brother into planting that tree after the ceremony.
Adrian: Tree?
Tad: Dixie's tree.
Adrian: What tree?
Tad: It's a long story. I'll tell you later. Dad, don't worry about a thing. James and I will plant the tree lickety-split, and when it's time to rake leaves, we'll take care of all the work.
Joe: Yeah, yeah. My son the gardener. Oh, boy, oh, boy. I hope he knows what he's doing.

Junior: What's all this guck?
Opal: "Guck"? Those are tools of the trade, mister.
Junior: Huh?
Opal: Yeah. I am about to make your mama into the mostest beautifulestest bride that ever walked down the aisle.
Junior: But Mom's already beautiful.
Dixie and Opal: Oh!
Dixie: Aren't you the handsomest, most intelligent son that has ever walked the planet.
Opal: Hmm.
Dixie: But I bet you're hungry, huh? Why don't you run downstairs and have some breakfast while auntie opal and I do our work. I bet there's a -- I thought I smelled blueberry pancakes down there.
Opal: Mm-hmm.
Junior: All right! Oh -- but you really don't need any work.
Opal: Oh, boy, out of the mouths of babes, huh? That kid is going to make some lucky gal a really terrific husband.
Hayley: The bride brigade is here!

[All shouting at once]

Hayley: Oh, makeup!
Dixie: Well, I don't know if there's that much to do, but having you all here is sure wonderful.
Alice: How are you feeling?
Dixie: I'm feeling like it's Christmas day and I'm about to get everything that I ever wanted.
Opal: Oh, it is Christmas day, honey, and it's the first day of summer vacation and the picnic on the fourth of July because you got all this love and support around you. Thanks, everybody, for coming.
Brooke: Oh, you know, we're just here because we're hoping that some of the Tad-and-Dixie magic rubs off on some of us.
Opal: Oh, really, from your lips toGod's ears. But we're all family this morning, and what do families do best but make beautiful weddings? So come on, you guys. Let's get cracking.
Brooke: Oh. Are you doing makeup?
Opal: Well, you know, I was thinking about it, but hair is really my specialty and so I would welcome, any support from the peanut gallery.
Alice: Hey, this is so much fun.
Opal: I know. Now, look at this blush here. Have you seen the dress? I can't quite figure --
Brooke: Oh, you know what? I think she could be wearing a potato sack and Dixie would still be beautiful, so forget the --
Opal: Well, I'm not arguing she's a natural beauty. But, you know, on a day like today, even nature could use a little backup, right, Dix?
Brooke: What about --
Opal: Dixie? Dixie?

Adam: Yes, I'd like to speak to Dr. David Hayward. Yes, I'm one of his patients. I've called the Valley Inn. They told me to call the hospital. You have no idea where he's been since yesterday? No, no. No message.
Liza: Who are you talking to?
Adam: Oh, I just called the WRCW weather person to see what was going on today.
Liza: Weather?
Adam: Yes, the wedding. Tad and Dixie's wedding is today.
Liza: Oh, that's right. I forgot. Oh. Isn't she beautiful?
Adam: She's an angel.
Liza: I'll tell you, she has the lungs of an opera singer. How can something so small make so much noise?
Adam: Well, she has to tell us if she's hungry or uncomfortable. We don't speak baby, you know.
Liza: I'm beginning to.
Adam: She can keep me up all of 1999 and she'll still be the world's most perfect child.
Liza: You know, I will remember that when we are walking the floors tomorrow night.
Adam: I love walking the floors.
Liza: Well, I think we visited every room in this house walking her.
Adam: Wasn't it great?
Liza: You're great.
Adam: Nah.
Liza: Where'd all that patience come from?
Adam: Oh, I don't know. Maybe I've always been patient. It's just never been tested.
Liza: Well, you'll get tested all you want this time.
Adam: Hmm, good. Oh, by the way, the nurse, the baby nurse, is here. She got here about a half an hour ago. She's waiting in the nursery.
Liza: Ok. Well, I should tell her about Colby's night.
Adam: No, all taken care of. You and I should start getting dressed for the wedding.
Liza: No, no. Oh, no, no. I can't go.

David: Bread and water? You want me alive?
Erica: Well, you're much more interesting alive.
David: This floor is cold.
Erica: Oh, you want me to fetch you a blanket so you can jump me and end this. Forget it.
David: You're enjoying this little game, aren't you?
Erica: This is not a game, David.
David: Well, call it whatever you want. But you're about to do permanent damage to my fingers.
Erica: And wouldn't that be a tragedy?
David: Yes, it would.
Erica: Just like my losing my face.
David: Erica, I have told you that I'm sorry.
Erica: Yeah, well, somehow you never sounded very convincing. Your words are cheap. Your words mean nothing.
David: Oh, yeah? And what does this mean? A woman has heart surgery, has a psychotic breakdown, and decides to torture her doctor? It might make a few medical journals, but it hardly explains how the universe came to be.
Erica: Oh, isn't that typical that you would compare yourself to the creation of the cosmos?
David: Oh, come on, Erica. If they were casting the book of "Genesis," you'd be playing God.
Erica: I don't think I'll be cast as anything anytime soon, David. I'm not exactly camera ready.
David: I know you feel damaged.
Erica: You know how I feel? I don't think so. But you're going to know how I feel. You are going to know exactly how it feels to lose the part of you that makes you who you are.
David: Ok, Erica, you made your point. And frankly, as devastating as it might be, losing cosmetic perfection -- it's not the same thing as losing the ability to save lives.
Erica: Oh, I see. So your life is more important than mine.
David: All right. All right, look -- try -- try to understand this. If I am not in surgery this morning, a patient will die.
Erica: Oh, a patient? What is that patient's name?
David: Baxter. He's scheduled for
a quadruple bypass. Erica: And you are, of course, the only cardiologist who can perform this?
David: No. But by the time they find a replacement, Mr. Baxter might be dead.
Erica: There's no contingency plan in a Joe Martin hospital? I don't think so.
David: If I don't show up, the hospital will be on alert. The police will be notified. Eventually, they'll find me, and you will be arrested.
Erica: I doubt it.
David: Fine. If you don't care about breaking the law, think about what you're doing to an innocent patient. He might die, Erica. The man needs me. Please, let me go.
Erica: And if I let you go, what will you do? David: Perform surgery, save a life. Erica: And right after you save a life, you'll go directly and destroy three lives -- Adam, Liza, and Colby, down the drain.
David: I guess you'll just have to wait and see.
Eric well, I have time.
David: But Mr. Baxter doesn't. It's your choice, Erica. You release me, and you save a life. You keep me here, and you kill an innocent man. Erica: You've done this before.
David: Done what?
Erica: Talked about a patient who needed you, a life-and-death situation. Isn't that what you told me? Didn't you tell me that night that you had to get back to Pine Valley because a patient needed you, doctor? The night you drove so recklessly through a blizzard, the night that my face was destroyed? But there was no patient, was there, doctor?
David: All right, all right, all right. No. No, there wasn't.
Erica: You lied.
David: I'm not lying now. Mr. Baxter needs me, Erica. Please, you have to let me go.
Erica: And if you don't, he could die?
David: Yes. Don't do this to him. I'm needed in the O.R.
Erica: No, David. You're not needed in the OR. today. And there is no Mr. Baxter.
David: You've lost your mind.
Erica: No, you've lost your mind if you think that I wouldn't call the hospital and check on your schedule.
David: No. No, they wouldn't have given you that information.
Erica: Well, of course they would. I'm your patient, remember? And when a patient needs her doctor -- and how surprised I was that you weren't at the hospital today and that you had no operations scheduled and no meetings scheduled, either.
David: You need your medication, Erica.
Erica: I need medication because you're lying to me? Because I don't believe a man who has lied and lied to me over and over again, a man who has ruined my life?
David: Let me go.
Erica: That's all you think about, isn't it? You and your fingers and your work and getting out of here. Well, how does it feel to be trapped, doctor? How does it feel to be trapped and not able to do your work, not able to do what you're good at and what you love to do, what people need?
David: You sell lipstick, for crying out loud! I save people's lives!
Erica: Oh, isn't that just like you to try to belittle what I do. For your information, doctor, I give people hope just like you do. I give them the tools to make them feel good about themselves just like you do. And because of you, I almost died!
David: No, no, no. You almost died because a jackass abandoned his truck in the middle of the interstate, in the middle of a snowstorm! But I saved your life!
Erica: Oh, thank you so much! You call this a life? A life where I can be consumed by pain and disfigurement? Well, under this mask, I may look like a monster, but you are a monster.
David: You keep me captive in your cellar, and you call me a monster?
Erica: You refused to help your own mother when she needed your help, when she was having a heart attack! You almost killed Adam Chandler, and now you want to ruin three lives -- Adam, Liza, and a newborn baby!
David: You're out of control.
Erica: I'm out of control?
David: Yes! Listen to yourself!
Erica: Oh, you are the one who needs control, who wants control, who demands control over everyone -- patients and family and everyone who comes in your path. Well, you know what? You've lost control. You don't have the control anymore. I have the power, and I have the control, not you.
David: No. No, you do not! You will never control me. Do you hear me? No woman will ever control me -- never!

Adam: Sweetheart, we have a baby nurse in the nursery and an entire household staff. Colby will be fine.
Liza: But I won't. I don't want to be out of the room if -- if she needs me, if she calls. I want to be able to walk across the room and pick her up.
Adam: Tad is counting on you being there.
Liza: Well, then you go, and I'll stay with Colby.
Adam: That's nutty. That's totally nutty. Tad doesn't want to see me, he wants to see you. And Dixie would be more than happy not to see on her wedding day.
Liza: Junior's in the wedding. You're Junior's father. You should go.
Adam: Oh, well, I -- well, then, we both should go or we both should stay with Colby. That's it.

Scott: Hi.
Liza: Hi.
Scott: I came to see Colby.
Liza: Well.
Adam: Scott. When did you get back?
Scott: Last night.
Liza: Welcome home.
Scott: Thanks.
Adam: When did you get in?
Scott: Last night. Dad tried calling, but he couldn't get through.
Liza: Really? I didn't hear the phone ring.
Adam: Oh. I disconnected all the ringers.
Liza: Adam. Adam: Well, I just didn't want to disturb Colby we've been up most of the night.
Scott: And there's the bundle of joy there, huh?
Adam: Right there. Behold.
Scott: Oh, wow. She's so beautiful.
Adam: Yeah.
Scott: So little.
Liza: Yeah. I'll tell you, she's something else. I don't like to get her in a position where she's out of my sight for a minute.
Adam: Yeah, we've been having a little -- a little new baby crisis here, I guess you'd call it. We both want to stay home with Colby, but we're both supposed to go to a wedding -- tad and Dixie's.
Scott: Tad and Dixie?
Liza: Mm-hmm.
Scott: Well, things have been happening, huh?
Liza: Mm-hmm, as you can see right here.
Scott: Yes. Some very modern arrangements by way of Jake Martin, I understand.
Liza: Yeah. Hey, that's a great idea. Why don't you go to the wedding with Scott? You -- you could go to the wedding with uncle Adam.
Adam: Sweetheart, no, no, no. If you're not going to the wedding, I'm not going to the wedding.
Liza: Oh, please. One of us has to go, and you could catch up with Scott.
Adam: Well, no. No, no, no, no. No, I just don't want to leave Colby.
Liza: You know, anyone would think that you're in love, Mr. Chandler.
Adam: Anyone would be right.

Dixie: Uncle Palmer. Hi. How are you?
Palmer: Shouldn't you be dressing for your wedding? You are getting married today, aren't you?
Dixie: Yes. I'm happy to say I am.
Palmer: My condolences.
Dixie: Um --
Palmer: You want something?
Dixie: Yes. I would like you at my wedding.
Palmer: I'd rather eat glass.
Dixie: Uncle Palmer, please, I would really, really like you at my wedding.
Palmer: I don't approve of this wedding. I don't approve of Tad. And I will not stand by and see another disaster.
Dixie: Look, Uncle Palmer, I know that we have had s
ome major disagreements. Palmer: You betrayed me to Opal. I hardly call that a disagreement.
Dixie: I did not betray you to -- I don't want to argue with you today, ok? Please, you're my mother's brother. I mean, couldn't you, for your sister's sake, set aside grudges and be there for me on what's supposed to be one of the happiest days of my life?

Joe: It's good to see you and Tad on a friendly footing.
Adrian: Well, today being what it is, we thought we should call a truce.
Joe: Well, good. Families should do more of that sort of thing.
Jake: What happened to the water?
Joe: Yeah? What's wrong with the water?
Jake: The water, it cut out -- I mean, there isn't any.
Joe: Well, sometimes it does that. The hot water gives up when you use it --
Jake: Dad, I don't mean hot water. I mean, there's no water of any kind. It completely cut out -- zero, zip, zilch, no more.
Joe: Oh, boy. The tree.
Jake: The tree? What tree?
Joe: They went out to plant a tree.
Jake: A tree? Now?
Joe: Yeah.
Jake: Why, why? It's his wedding day.
Adrian: It's for Dixie.
Jake: I think we've got a problem, Grandpa.
Joe: Oh, boy. What?
Jamie: Well, Dad only swung the pickax a couple of times, but the ground was really hard and --
Joe: Oh, tell me you didn't!
Tad: Dad, I didn't mean to. I swear I didn't. I don't know what to say. I mean, one minute, I was digging a hole. The next thing I knew, I was --
Joe: The next thing, you went into our water main.
Tad: Well, it's -- it's not so bad, Dad. Really, it's not. I mean, it's -- it's a kind of nice effect, you know, like a lakeside deal.
Joe: Yeah, maybe like a swampside deal.
Jamie: Did we make a mistake?
Tad: We made a disaster. , Can you turn it off by the source?
Joe: Well, no, not if it's the water main. Oh, hey, call the water department, quick.
Adrian: All right, I'm on it.
Jake: Does that mean I can't finish my shower? I'm cold.
Joe: Aw.
Tad: Help yourself. There's plenty of water out there. I may join you. At this point, I'd rather drown than explain what happened to Mom.
Jake: You got the touch.
Tad: Look, what are we going to do about the wedding? The ceremony's supposed to be at the garden with the reception spilling into the front yard.
Jake: Well, now what's going in the front yard is about 100,000 gallons of water. Joe: Where are people going to park?
Jamie: Cars? They'll need boats to get to the house.
Tad: Don't be funny. We're talking about Dixie's wedding.
Ryan: Hey. You guys know there's a lake out there? It's spreading very quickly. I had to park -- all right. Ok, how can I help?
Jake: You got any idea where we can relocate the wedding?
Ryan: Uh -- Valley Inn?
Tad: Forget it. I called them first weeks ago. They're booked solid.
Dimitri: Whoa! Hey, Tad, everyone, you know it's kind of wet out there, right?
Edmund: You know you got a lake out in your front yard, Joe?
Joe: Ha-ha-ha, ha-ha-ha.
Jamie: Dad made a dumb move. Now we might have to cancel the wedding.
Ryan: Whoa, whoa. Not cancel -- postpone, right? We can make some calls?
Tad: No, not on your life. I promised Dixie we were getting married today, and today it is. May 20 is going down in history.
Joe: As what? A day at the beach? Look, maybe we better take Ryan's suggestion and start calling people.
Tad: No, no, no. Nobody do anything. Get out of my way. I'll take care of this.
Joe: Oh -- yeah. Please --
Adrian: I know. I'm on it, I'm on it.
Dimitri: Whoa!

Liza: You and Scott and Stuart go to the wedding, and I'll stay at home with Colby.
Adam: Liza, I am not going to leave you here alone.
Liza: I'll call mother. I'll have her keep me company.
Adam: No. No, no, I have the perfect solution -- we'll all go to the wedding.
Liza: We're not taking a newborn to a ceremony.
Adam: We'll take Colby and the baby nurse and put them in the limo while we're inside in the ceremony.
Liza: I guess that could work.
Adam: Of course it could work. There's room in the limousine for all of the baby's stuff. And then Colby can take a nap. And every 15 or 20 seconds, you can come out and check on her.
Liza: You're a genius.
Adam: But of course. I want my women with me.
Liza: Oh. Fine, it's settled. So, anyway, tell me what has been going on in the west in college land.
Scott: Quite a lot, actually.
Liza: Hmm. Any news in the communications field?
Scott: Hopefully my own. I was going to ask you if there's any positions available at WRCW.
Liza: Any particular area?
Scott: Directing, editing. I took a few film classes, and I've done a lot of work as a cameraman.
Liza: Really? Welcome to the dark side.
Scott: It's neat to finally settle on a direction.
Liza: Television.
Scott: For starters. I think I could be real useful at WRCW, learning my way up the ladder.
Liza: Well, we've missed you. And, you know, you're a good worker, you're intelligent. Really, I think it could work.
Scott: You think so?
Liza: Yeah. Why don't we talk.
Adam: Why don't you talk in the next room so we don't keep Colby awake.
Liza: Oh, well, ok. I don't think we will, but I don't want to be out of her sight.
Adam: But I'll watch -- I'll call you if she makes a peep. I swear.
Liza: Ok. I'll be back in 10 minutes.
Adam: Ok.
Liza: Come on.

Adam: Answer the phone, Erica. Answer it, damn it! I know you're up to something.

David: You are going to pay for this, Erica.

[Telephone rings]

Erica: Why are you so obsessed with a woman getting the best of you, as if there were some best of you to get?
David: You do not control me. Erica: Then get up and go. N this gets to you, doesn't it? I mean, in the most profound way.
David: You think you know me. You don't. But I know you. You think you're enlightened, thoughtful, sensitive? But you're none of those things, or else you couldn't be doing this to me.
Erica: Oh, I don't think anyone would go along with that reasoning.
David: You think that the world adores you, that you deserve all the fame, money, power, pleasure you can rake in. So you rake it in. You take and take and take till you've destroyed every man who's ever loved you. You don't care who you trample on or even who you kill as long as you get what you want.
Erica: You're not talking about me. You're talking about somebody else. Somebody has done you a great deal of harm -- a woman. Who is it, David? Who turned you into this woman-hating fiend?
Erica: I thought that we were communicating, and now you've shut down. Why?
David: Oh, I'm sorry. You want a heart-to-heart? The ambience isn't exactly conducive.
Erica: Well, indulge me. You're not going anywhere. Who are you really?
David: I'm a healer. I make very sick people well. I don't know how I got the gift or where it came from, and frankly, I don't care to know. But I have it. So no matter what else I might do, what else you or the world might think of me, I can save lives. And when I involve myself with a patient, I think only of that patient's welfare.
Erica: Even if you created that patient's affliction?
David: Erica, if you would just abandon this absurd conspiracy theory and follow Fascinella's orders, your face might be completely restored.
Erica: Oh, yes. Vanessa filled me in on dr. Fascinella.
David: Oh, great. Good. My loving mother. What else did she tell you about Fascinella?
Erica: She told me that the good doctor was a friend of yours from med school and that he would do anything you tell him to do, including to me to give me hope that I might recover, and the lie is really meant to keep me quiet.
David: The lie is Vanessa's. Ok, yes. Yes, Eduardo and I are friends, and yes, we did meet in med school. But he's honestly a brilliant plastic surgeon. You can't believe my mother's lies.
Erica: Why not? Why not, David? Is she evil?
David: Yes. She would like to destroy you.
Erica: Why would Vanessa want to destroy me?
David: Because she hates you as much as she hates me. As a narcissist, she has us both beaten hands down, Erica. She is so consumed with not getting what she really wants that when she sees someone who has it -- fame, fortune, talent -- she annihilates them.
Erica: Well, David, I know you don't love your mother, but, "annihilates"?
David: Yes. She's a killer, Erica. And the sooner you believe that, the better off you'll be. She'll kill you if she can. Dixie: Uncle palmer, I know in your heart that you don't want all this bad blood between us. I know that.

Palmer: You think that I'm wrong about Opal. Well, I think you're wrong.
Dixie: Could we just forget about Opal and the divorce and think about pigeon hollow and your sister and your sister's daughter, who wants more than anything to have her uncle see her get married? Please. You're my family. You should be at my wedding.
Palmer: If I thought you were making a decent marriage, I might be tempted. But you are about to repeat a mistake that brought you misery before, and it will again.
Dixie: Well, I'm sorry you see that way. And I'm sorry you're making yourself so unhappy and lonely.

Tad: Honey.
Dixie: What are you doing?
Tad: I have to talk to you.
Dixie: No, no!

{Dixie hids behind a door}

Tad: No, no, wait, wait, wait --
Dixie: No, no, no --
Tad: This is important. Wait.
Dixie: No, no, no! You can't see me on our wedding day!
Tad: Well, that's going to make our honeymoon really interesting.
Dixie: It's bad luck. It's bad luck to see somebody on your wedding day.
Tad: You want to know about bad luck?
Dixie: What are you doing here anyway? Aren't you supposed to be at your parents' house getting dressed?
Tad: Honey, that's the thing. I was supposed to be at my parents' getting dressed, but my parents' is underwater. I broke a pipe and -- and the back yard is flooded.
Dixie: You're kidding.
Tad: No.
Dixie: How did that happen?
Tad: That's what I'm --
Dixie: Wait, don't tell me. Don't tell me. I don't want to know, I don't want to know. No, I want to know. You know, tell me. I could use a good laugh.
Tad: All right, fine. Look, I -- Jamie and I were doing some gardening, you know. We were planting our tree, and I accidentally swung this pickax and it -- I hit the main water line. Long story short, Mom and Dad now have their own moat, and I'm here looking for a new place for us to get hitched.
Dixie: Oh, baby. Don't you know I would marry you on a street corner if I had to?
Tad: Yeah, well, I think they're all booked, but I appreciate the sentiment.
Dixie: Hmm. Oh, you're going to find someplace. I know you will.
Tad: I will, honey. I promise you I will. I'm going to fix this somehow. I'll take care of it. Um -- I'm going to make our wedding day as beautiful and memorable as I possibly can, but I need you to do me a favor. Just go back to Opal's and start to get ready and I'll call you later with the coordinates, all right?
Dixie: All right.
Tad: Ok.
Dixie: I want to kiss you, but I must resist.
Tad: Uh-huh.
Dixie: I've already gotten the water gods angry. Ok, close your eyes. Don't look, ok?
Tad: All right. Go.
Dixie: You are so good.
Tad: Mm-hmm.

Tad: Hey. What's up?
Adrian: Look, I tried. I even tried to use my best "undercover operative working for the free world," but it didn't work. It's a no-go, guy.
Tad: That's ridiculous. This place has got to have something.
Adrian: No.
Tad: I mean, it's full of these special rooms.
Adrian: They're all booked up for this -- some dog show or something. You see all the rings out in front?
Tad: Dog show? What are you telling me -- canines outrank human beings now?
Adrian: Well, seems to be this weekend, if they're huskies, they do.
Tad: Siberian huskies?
Adrian: Yeah. They've got the Garden room, the Colonial room, the Cumberland room, the Shenandoah --
Tad: Shh, shh. WAIT,... wait, wait.
Adrian: What?
Tad: I got an idea. Listen --
Adrian: No.
Tad: No, no, just back me up if I need you, ok? You think you got scams? You ain't seen nothing yet.
Adrian: All right.
Tad: Huskies. Got to love them.
Woman: Oh, you're Tad Martin, aren't you?
Tad: That's right.
Woman: From "the Cutting Edge."
Tad: "The Cutting Edge," that's right. And you are?
Woman: I'm Dottie Burke.
Tad: Dottie.
Dottie: Yeah. I'm president of the Pennsylvania Siberian husky club.
Tad: President? Well, isn't that something? Nice to meet you. You know something? I used to have a husky myself. Actually, I had two of them. They were great -- you know, smart and beautiful and loving. They were wonderful pets.
Dottie: "Were"? What happened to them?
Tad: Oh, well, I'm afraid that Boris and Schotzie have gone to that great iditarod in the sky, you know.
Dottie: Oh.
Tad: But I'll never forget them. They're -- they're a part of me, you know? Actually, you know what? We're thinking of doing a segment on the show about pet owners, and I was going to talk about it, but since you're the president, how would you like to come on and talk about how great the husky breed is?
Dottie: Oh!

Joe: Jake, Jake. How's your mother holding up?
Jake: So far, so good. She's trying everybody she knows. Even tried the hospital, but no dice.
Joe: Yeah.
Jake: She's calm, though.
Jack: Oh, you can't be
talking about your mother. Mateo: Oh. Ruth Martin is freaking -- oh, Dr. Martin. Um, yeah. She -- she called S.O.S. Asking if maybe she could stage the wedding there, and -- the air conditioning's out, but she's --
Jack: Yeah. She actually called me, too, and I don't even own a restaurant. She was pretty --
Jake: She's not freaking out.
Joe: Oh, boy, oh, boy. I don't know what we're going to do.

[Telephone rings]

Edmund: Listen, Joe, I'd offer you the Wildwind chapel.
Dimitri: Unfortunately, it's being reroofed as we speak. Remember?
Edmund: But if Tad strikes out, we can always fix up the terrace.
Dimitri: Yeah, the terrace. Joe: Well, thank you both.

[Jake whistles]

Jake: It's Adrian at the Valley Inn. What's happening?
Adrian: Quite possibly a miracle.
Jake: What? What? What? What? What?
Adrian: Tad may have just landed the Garden Room at the Valley Inn.
Tad: Thanks a lot. Bye-bye.

{Tad gives Adrian the "thumbs up" and proceeds to do a very HAPPY dance!]

Adrian: Hey, he did it. He did it. Listen, get the word out that the ceremony's going to be here at the Valley Inn. All right?
Jake: All right, all right. Good. We'll see you when we get there.
Adrian: Listen, one more thing. Don't hang up, all right? Tad and I need you to bring our clothes over here. We're going to stay here and get things set up.
Jake: Roger that. Adrian: And don't forget -- tell Dixie what happened.
Jake: Oh. Right. All right, everybody to the car phones, cell phones. The wedding has been rerouted to the Garden Room at the Valley Inn.
Mateo: Garden Room, all right.
Joe: Look, I got the guest list right here. I'll give everybody a page.
Ryan: All right. Cell phone.
Mateo: I got the kitchen! I got the kitchen.
Joe: All right. There you are.
Mateo: Thank you very much.
Dimitri: All right, thank you.
Jamie: I'll tell Grandma.
Dimitri: I'll be out in my car.
Joe: I'll get upstairs.

Ryan: Spectacular. Gillian you look just great..
Gillian: You look -- you look pretty spectacular yourself.
Ryan: Thank you.
Gillian: Do you think Dr. Martin knows that there's a lake in his front yard?
Ryan: Yeah, yeah. He knows, he knows.
Gillian: What happened? Ryan: Oh, don't ask, don't ask. They're moving the wedding to the Valley Inn. But I'm sure Mrs. Martin could use some help moving the flowers and the decorations over. Jake's upstairs making some calls.
Gillian: Ok.
Ryan: Yeah.
Gillian: Well, it was nice -- it's nice to see you.
Ryan: Yeah. Nice to see you, too. Gillian: I think Mrs. Martin is upstairs, so I'll just go.

Mateo: Hey. How's my beautiful wife, huh? What are you wearing? Oh, oh, listen, listen. Um -- tell Dixie that Tad got the Garden Room at the Valley Inn for the wedding. Yeah.

Opal: Honey.
Dixie: Hi.
Opal: Oh, my goodness. I was worried about you. Where have you been? Are you ok?
Dixie: Yeah. I just tried to do the impossible.
Opal: What's that?
Dixie: Tried to get somebody to come to my wedding.
Opal: A family somebody? Palmer won't come? Well, it is his loss, honey. You just remember that. And if he is alone at the end of his days, it'll be his loss, too. I'm sorry.

Hayley: Ok. Everybody, the wedding's been moved --
Brooke and Opal: What?
Hayley: To the Garden Room at the Valley Inn, and the Martins need our help.
Opal: Uh-oh.
Hayley: Chop-chop.
Brooke: That's a pretty place. They did?
Hayley: Let's go.
Alice: Ok.

[All talking at once]

Brooke: We'll see you there.
Belinda: Ok, we'll see you there.
Dixie: All right, good.
Junior: Mom, you're not changed. You haven't changed your mind, have you?
Dixie: No, no, no, no. No, no, don't worry. I'm not going to be late, either. I'm going to marry Tad come frog blizzards, quakes, or floods.
Junior: Frog blizzards?
Dixie: Oh, yeah. They're the worst.
Junior: Well, I like frogs.
Dixie: Oh, sweetie. I'm going to be so happy when we're all a family, you and me and Tad and Jamie.
Junior: I can't wait till Jamie's my brother.
Opal: Yeah. Well, then, we got to get these troops going. It's showtime.
Dixie: Oh, no.
Opal: You sit down here, little miss. I'm going to use some of this guck --
Dixie: Ah!
Opal: And just spray the daylights out of her!
Dixie: Ok.

David: You're a wonderful mother, Erica. Of course it would be difficult for you to conceive of a mother who'd never love her child, never hold him or rock him to sleep at night, or even say a kind word to him.
Erica: But I've seen Vanessa with you. And I've heard her talk about you, and she loves you.
David: Oh, no. It's an act. She pretends to love me because that's the role she's playing right now -- mother of a cardiologist -- of a famous cardiologist, no less. Is it any wonder that I'm so good at fixing broken hearts?
Erica: Well, some mothers aren't as good as others at nurturing, but that doesn't mean they don't love their children.
David: Why is it so hard for you to believe this, Erica? You called me a monster? It's Vanessa who's the monster -- a cold, calculating, self-serving monster.
Erica: But you called her a killer. Now, surely that's an exaggeration.
David: Have I ever mentioned how my father died? Vanessa killed him.
Erica: Well, it must have been terrible for you -- I mean, your father committing suicide.
David: Yes. It was devastating.
Erica: But your father took his own life. Surely you can't blame your mother for that.
David: No. It was all her doing.
Erica: I find that very difficult to believe.
David: I can't. No, I've already said enough.
Erica: If you stop now, I will never believe another word you say. Tell me, David. Go on.

[Classical music plays]

Minister: Tad? You know, I really have to hand it to you, moving the wedding. But where's your bride?
Tad: Oh, she'll be here. Trust me.
Minister: Oh!

[Gallery reacts]

Man: [Chasing dog} Esther, heel! Heel! Sorry. He's excited.
Tad: It's all right. I know how he feels.

[Laughter]

["Wedding March" plays]

[Everyone turns to see the bride]