ALL MY CHILDREN

SEPTEMBER 27, 2001



Greenlee: What's the deal with Laura losing those pills? Don't you think it's strange that Laura wants to keep it a secret from Leo?

Bianca: "Enchant the unavailable man." The unavailable man is Leo.

Mateo: Consider this a down payment on your new son's future. Keep your cell phone turned on for further details.

Chris: Who are they? Ryan: My mom and dad.


TODAY'S - - - - ALL MY CHILDREN

Adam: This is a hero's welcome for your son.
Hayley: Yes. It would be nice if his father was here to see it.
Edmund: Beautiful baby. Listen, my daughter, Maddie, she already wants to baby-sit in 10 years, she's offering.
Hayley: Well, that's terrific. I don't suppose anyone has seen Mateo? Anyone at all?
Edmund: I thought -- I thought you drove with him from the chapel.
Adam: No, no, no. Hayley came with us. He had to stay and take another call, he said. So we came over separately. I think he could have turned his cell phone off long enough to baptize his son, don't you?

Hayley: Listen, everybody, there is so much food here, and I'm not intending on taking any of it home with me. So I want to see everybody dig in. Help yourselves, now.

Jake: Hey, here he is.
Mateo: Hi, guys. Hi.
Hayley: Do you want to tell me what's going on?
Mateo: Have you seen my sister?
Hayley: No, I haven't.
Mateo: No, you haven't seen -- Edmund, did you see who Rosa drove over here with?
Edmund: I thought with your mom.
Mateo: Mom? Have you seen Rosa?
Isabella: I don't -- no, Mijo.
Hayley: What's the problem?
Isabella: Before, yeah. When I came in with her, she was over --
Rosa: Here's Mama's outrageous lemon cake.
Jake: There she is.
Isabella: Wait, Mateo --

Rosa: Hey.
Mateo: Hi. I need to talk to you.
Rosa: Ok.
Mateo: Come on.

Hayley: Ok, everybody, there's all this chicken that thinks it's coming home with me, but it's not. So dig on in.
Edmund: Thanks for giving us the word.

Rosa: Mateo, what's up with you? What --
Mateo: Are you ok?
Rosa: Yeah, I'm fine. What's going on?
Mateo: Did you talk to anyone? Did anyone talk to you after the chapel, when you left the chapel?
Rosa: Did anybody talk to me?
Mateo: Anybody you didn't know? Anybody you didn't recognize?
Rosa: Mateo, I know everybody here.
Mateo: Did anything strange happen? Did anything weird, out of the ordinary happen at all?
Rosa: Besides you being a total freak right now?
Mateo: Listen, if anything goes down, you look for me. Do you hear me? If anything weird starts to happen, look for me, call me. Do you understand me? Ok?
Rosa: No, not ok. Mateo, you're scaring me.
Mateo: Just don't be scared. Be alert. Be alert.
Rosa: God, is this about Marcus? Is that what this is all about?
Mateo: It's not about Marcus. Come on, forget about Marcus. I can't get into it right now, just -- I don't want to freak Mom and Hayley out. Just do what I say. Do you understand me?
Rosa: Yeah, ok.
Mateo: Ok. Have you seen Stamp? I need to talk to Stamp. He said he was going to tend bar for the party. Have you seen him?
Rosa: No, I -- I was just in the kitchen. It's only Eddie and Otto running things.
Mateo: Ok. Enjoy the party.
Rosa: Yeah.

Erica: No, I'm sorry, just don't understand. I don't know how this could possibly have happened. I mean, I just -- I don't get it. How could he have been so careless?
Mateo: Hi.
Erica: Oh.
Mateo: Hi. Thank you so much for coming.
Erica: Uh-huh.
Mateo: Have you seen Stamp, Chris Stamp?
Erica: If only. No, Mr. Stamp stood us up. We had to drive ourselves here.
Bianca: Imagine.
Erica: Well, it seems that he misplaced my limousine.
Bianca: Mom, it probably got ripped off. That isn't exactly Chris' fault.
Erica: But the fact that he didn't call me to tell me what is going on, that is certainly his fault. And I don't know where he is.
Mateo: Well, when you do see him, can you tell him that I'm looking for him? Enjoy the party.
Erica: Mateo? Mateo, look, I know that Mr. Stamp works for you and for me, but I just -- I wouldn't count on him for anything. And don't be so sure that anything he tells you is the actual truth.

Ryan: What a summer. And now this. I get some random phone call from my mother's Hospice telling me that she's dead. I guess I'm the only Lavery left with a working telephone number. They say that -- they say she's dead, and then they tell me I have to start making funeral arrangements. I haven't the slightest clue what to . I mean, she never told me, I never asked.
Chris: So -- so there's just you?
Ryan: No, I got a brother, Braden, but he's on the run and he could give a damn and I'm sure they never tried to contact my father.
Chris: And you -- you don't keep in touch with your father?
Ryan: No. I don't even know why I kept this. It's like they're complete strangers.
Chris: Ryan, don't do it.

Laura: Leo, you were so right about me working for "Tempo." This is going to be so good for us.
Leo: Well, no, this is more about you than it is about us, Laura.
Laura: No, but you took a real risk showing my mom the stuff I wrote during the surgery. I mean, you had no idea how she'd take that.

Greenlee: Oh, no. He didn't know Brooke would be all over that like a wet shirt.

Laura: And I think you're right. I've been too negative, lately. I think I could be a real bright spot at the magazine. You know, a real source of hope.

Greenlee: Gag me.

Laura: You're the best husband ever.

Greenlee: Best liar ever. I am so out --

[Twig snaps]

Laura: Leo, check it out. We've got a stalker. Don't be shy, Greenlee. Come hear our good news.
Leo: Laura, don't provoke her.
Greenlee: Oh, don't worry, Leo. I won't bite. Actually, thank you for smoothing over what could have been an awkward situation.
Laura: Oh, I don't feel awkward. Do you, Honey?
Greenlee: You and your Honey don't know what it is that I was waiting here to tell you.
Leo: Greenlee, whatever this is, just please let it go.
Greenlee: Oh, don't worry, Leo. This is something I bet you're just dying to hear.
Leo: Greenlee, I'm not sure what this is exactly, but whatever it is, just, please, we have nothing else to say.
Laura: Leo, it's cool. There's nothing you can say that will hurt me. I know who I am and what is mine.
Greenlee: How nice for you.
Leo: Greenlee, why don't you just go back to whatever it is you were doing --
Greenlee: Oh, you see, Leo, that's just it. I'm moving forward. That's what I wanted to share with you -- both. My -- my sincerest apology.
Laura: , So you were spying on us from behind the bushes, waiting for the right time to apologize.
Greenlee: Oh, that was unplanned. I was on a walk on my way to the christening party, and I saw you lovebirds. I didn't want to intrude on a happy moment or have you thinking what you're obviously thinking about my motives right now.
Laura: Yes, and what are your motives today, Greenlee? Oh, trying to convince me there's still something going on between you and Leo?
Greenlee: No, Laura. Like I said, I was going to apologize. I'm backing off 100%. I got your husband's message loud and clear. I'll be damn if I sit around and wait for a man who doesn't want me. Oh, I suppose there is bound to be one one day. Bet's off, too. Forget the bet, forget everything. I wouldn't want to jeopardize your health.
Laura: Oh, my health is fine.
Greenlee: Oh, I know, I know. But when I saw you in the ER with Jake earlier today, well, you know, it got me to thinking, this isn't a game. I mean, this is your life, Laura. And you have a real burden on your hands for the rest of your life with that heart transplant. I'm sorry I was lurking. I didn't mean to be. You guys take care and -- and really enjoy each other, ok? Ciao.

Leo: You went to the hospital today?
Laura: There's nothing --
Leo: Now, don't lie to me, Laura.

Adam: Where's my brother?
Marian: Oh, excuse me. Stuart just went crazy with the gifts, Adam. He felt -- you know, he's the godfather, so he felt he had to go kind of over the top. So Lord knows what kind of haul he has in the trunk of his car. But he's been gone since --
Adam: Liza's doing well.
Marian: Was that a rhetorical question, Adam?
Adam: No, I was just -- wanted to tell you that Liza's doing well.
Marian: Oh.
Adam: I've been in touch with --
Marian: Have you? Yes, I've been in touch with her every day since she and Colby went away.
Adam: Usually, as a matter of fact, she calls me about this time of day, just before she puts Colby down for her nap. But it's -- well, it's not like clockwork, of course. It's because of the time change. How many hours is that, again?
Marian: Do I look like I just fell off a turnip truck, Adam?
Adam: Hmm?
Marian: You want to get some sort of clue as to where Liza is so you can send one of your overpaid lackeys to track her down, right?
Adam: Marian, you caught me.
Marian: You're damned right I did.
Adam: Marian, I just -- I want to surprise her. Big surprise, just show up there. Just tell me where she is, please.
Marian: Adam, this is not going to work. At least not in this century.
Adam: I have a right to be with my wife.
Marian: You have no rights now, as far as I'm concerned. Oh, and don't try to disguise yourself as Stuart to get the information out of me because I won't be fooled by that, either.
Adam: I need to be with Liza.
Marian: You need to respect your wife.
Adam: I do respect my wife.
Marian: Adam, would you just shut up, go get a cup of coffee, and leave me alone? Thank you.

Vanessa: Well, hello.
Marian: Oh. Please, what are you doing here?
Vanessa: Well, I'm attending the christening party. What are you doing here, Marian?
Marian: You mean you were invited?
Vanessa: Well, it is an informal affair. I think everyone's invited, right?
Marian: Gosh, Vanessa. Are things so slow at chez vous that you need to crash christening parties now, or are you just going back to your old ways?
Vanessa: My old ways? Well, if you mean, do I still know how to show up for a party, yes, indeed, I do.
Marian: No, no. I mean you know how to show up for free food. Excuse me.

Edmund: There's nothing to it, you know.
Mateo: What? What are you talking about?
Edmund: Parenting.
Mateo: Oh.
Edmund: You ok? Mateo?
Mateo: Yeah.

Erica: Mateo, excuse me. I couldn't help but notice that you just hung up the phone. Was that Mr. Stamp?
Mateo: No. No, I haven't heard from him.
Erica: Where is that man?
Chris: I -- I just think you shouldn't throw the picture away is all.

Ryan: Why do you care?
Chris: I don't. I -- you know, pictures are funny. You -- you think that when you lose someone, you want all of that gone so you don't have to think about it ever again. But then maybe 10 years will pass by and you won't have that picture anymore and because in some crazy moment you just --
Ryan: But what difference does this make to you?
Chris: Doesn't. It -- look, you're upset, and I just think it's a bad idea to toss your only picture away that you have of your mom on the day you found out she -- she died.
Ryan: I'm really not that upset.
Chris: Call it shock, whatever. I mean, I just don't want you to do something now that you may regret later. It's no big deal.
Ryan: I have a lot of regrets, and I deal with them.
Chris: Do you?
Ryan: Look, you don't know me or my parents, so what gives you the right to ask me anything about my life? In fact, what are you still doing here? You brought my bike back, thank you very much. Your limo's outside. You can go.
Chris: I'm just thinking you shouldn't be alone right now.
Ryan: Where is this coming from? I mean, you just happened to be standing next to me when I found out that my mother died.
Chris: Exactly, so I --
Ryan: Look, this isn't some sort of karmic experience I need to bond over, ok? It's just -- it's just bad luck.
Chris: Just thinking you need someone to talk to.
Ryan: I'm fine. And even if I wasn't, this is none of --

[Phone rings]

Ryan: Get that.
Chris: I know who it is.
Ryan: Get it and get out.

Chris: I'm busy.
Erica: Oh, are you really? Is that why you haven't answered your phone when I' called?
Chris: Two dozen times.
Erica: You act as if I'm harassing you.
Chris: Aren't you?
Erica: Excuse me, Mr. Stamp, you work for me. And I had to get myself here to S.O.S.
Chris: How tragic. You know, this is really ridiculous. I don't have the time nor the energy to deal with you right now.
Erica: Well, you better find both of them because I want you here in 20 minutes or else I will -- what?
Bianca: He didn't feel like chatting, I guess?

Chris: Look, I'm sorry about that, Ryan.

Laura: Leo, I wasn't lying to you, I swear.
Leo: Laura, you had to go to the hospital today, and you purposely kept if from me. If that isn't lying, then I don't --
Laura: It was nothing. I -- it was a checkup.
Leo: And I know when all your checkups are scheduled, and today you didn't have a checkup scheduled.
Laura: It was a last-minute thing.
Leo: Is it because you're not feeling well?
Laura: No. No, I swear.
Leo: Then why did you keep it from me?
Laura: Because I hate worrying you and I hate every conversation having to be about my recovery.
Leo: Laura, I'm a part of this, too.
Laura: I know.
Leo: Well, then why are you shutting me out?
Laura: Look, it was no big deal, ok? David's away, I guess, so Jake's covering, and I knew that might get you worked up. You're just so -- you're so protective and everything.
Leo: Why didn't you say so?
Laura: Well, it was nothing. And last time I got upset over nothing, I was fighting with Bianca and I got you involved. You got mad --
Leo: That is so not what this is about.
Laura: Look, Jake says I'm doing great. Doesn't that make you feel better? Leo, I just wanted to have one day where we didn't talk about my heart rate or my blood pressure, ok?
Leo: Ok. Just don't keep things from me, ok?
Laura: Ok. Let's just go to the party and pretend we're like everybody else.
Leo: All right, but you heard Greenlee. She's going to be there.
Laura: Yeah, I don't care. Do you?
Leo: No.
Laura: Good. Let's go have fun, then.
Leo: Ok.
Laura: We can walk. It's a beautiful night.
Leo: All right.

Jake: Hey, there.
Greenlee: Did you pay your respects to the crown prince yet?
Jake: Yep. And you should, too.
Greenlee: Yeah, I will. I need to decompress.
Jake: Does a day ever go by when you don't see Leo?
Greenlee: I had a total run-in with him and the wife. Not planned, I promise.
Jake: Keep your mouth shut?
Greenlee: Do I ever?
Jake: No, no, no, about what matters to me, about doctor-patient confidentiality.
Greenlee: Hey, I'm not the one who took the hippopotamus oath, Dr. Martin, you are.
Jake: You didn't?
Greenlee: No, I didn't. Do you have any faith in me at all?
Jake: You didn't share your suspicions about Laura? You just kept that pretty little mouth shut?
Greenlee: Mm-hmm. About that, yeah.
Jake: You swear?
Greenlee: Yeah, I swear. Jake, you would have been proud of me. I could have spilled the whole gordita, but I didn't.
Jake: Yeah.
Greenlee: I didn't tell Leo his little wife is lying to him about her medication and God knows what else or why. Look, Mr. Mad Face, I apologized.
Jake: To Leo?
Greenlee: And Laura.
Jake: For what?
Greenlee: For not being more magnanimous about their love that wouldn't die.
Jake: You said "magnanimous"?
Greenlee: No, but I got my point across. Look, my new MO? Hang back and give Laura just enough rope to hang herself. She's doing all the work, and I don't have to be the bad girl for once.
Jake: Just hope you know you know what you're doing, Greenlee.
Greenlee: Oh, I do. And you can watch for yourself. If you can stomach her "look at me, I'm married" body language number. She's going to self-destruct. Just you wait.

Laura: Hey, do you want to -- we should go say hi to Bianca.
Leo: Maybe we should wait until you two make up or something.
Laura: That's nuts. She's my friend.
Leo: Yeah, and you're fighting, and she's with her mother, who wraps her up like a baby every time she thinks Bianca's being threatened. You don't need that and neither do I.
Laura: Come on. I can be the bigger person.

Bianca: I'm moving to Istanbul.
Erica: What? What was that? What?
Bianca: Mom, just whatever is about to happen, just let me handle it, please. Ok?

Laura: Hi.
Erica: Hello, Laura. Hello, Leo. Laura, you're looking well.
Laura: Oh, I'm fine. Don't even think about it.
Erica: Ok. Leo, you're looking tired.
Leo: Thank you, Erica.
Laura: Leo, could you get me a punch or something at the bar?
Leo: Are you sure?
Bianca: Get her some punch, Leo. It's ok.
Leo: Erica, would you like to come with me?
Erica: Oh, no, no. No, thank you. Not yet, no, no. You don't mind if I stay and hear what you have to say to Bianca, do you?
Laura: Oh, no, not at all. It's not a secret.
Bianca: Laura, can we do this some other time? Like maybe when I'm straight?
Erica: Bianca.
Bianca: No, Mom, I know what this is. I'm not in the mood.
Laura: You were so sure you knew what was happening between me and Leo.
Bianca: And here we go.
Laura: I just wanted to be sure you were really clear how wrong you were about my marriage, Bianca. It's perfect in every way.
Erica: Well, then, Laura, you'd better call "Ripley's" because I don't know anyone who can say that.
Laura: Oh, well, no one else is married to Leo. You told me I was incapable of love.
Bianca: I did not say that.
Laura: But I'm very capable. Just not the kind of love that you wanted.
Bianca: Laura, first, I was your friend, and that is all I've ever asked of you, and you know it, no matter what I might have felt about you.
Laura: You would have jumped at the chance to be with me, Bianca, if I'd even given you an inch.
Erica: Laura, excuse me, what is your problem?
Bianca: Mom, it's ok. She's just -- I don't know what she is, but just let it alone.
Laura: I don't have a problem, Erica. But Bianca does. She can't let other people be happy.
Bianca: Oh, come on.
Laura: I think it's a gay thing.
Bianca: Excuse me?
Laura: But we wouldn't understand that.
Bianca: Laura, who the hell are you?
Erica: No, Bianca, don't let her bait you. Excuse me, did you send Leo to get you some punch so he wouldn't have to witness your being so cruel to the best friend you ever had, Laura?
Laura: No, Leo is my best friend. And my husband. And my lover.
Erica: You ought to have David check your dosage, Laura. You're acting very strange.
Laura: Look, Bianca attacked my marriage. I have to protect that.
Bianca: I didn't attack anything, and that is a lot more than I can say about you, Laura.
Laura: Just remember what I said, Bianca.

Erica: What on earth --
Bianca: Just forget about it. You know, I was harsh when I saw her the last time, so --
Erica: Well, I'm sure you weren't as harsh as that.
Bianca: I was honest, and she hated it.
Erica: And you should have fought back.
Bianca: Mom, just don't lecture me about this right now. I already feel like I want to crawl into a hole and die.
Erica: You don't mean that.
Bianca: It's a figure of speech. Let it go.
Erica: No, I will not.
Bianca: Mom, just -- I swear! I'm going to go and I'm going to look at the baby because he doesn't have attitude yet.

Mateo: Where did you get that?
Hayley: Well, Uncle Trevor sent it via express.
Mateo: Oh.
Hayley: I hate to break it to you, but, you know, your son has a little bit of "T-rash" in his gene pool.
Mateo: What?
Hayley: I'm just trying to cheer you up.
Mateo: Oh.
Hayley: Ok, spill. What is it?
Mateo: No, no, I'm just -- I'm stressed out about, you know -- Chris Stamp was supposed to show up and he blew me off again, and I'm a little understaffed, and I wanted this day to be great, you know?
Hayley: Uh-huh. And is that why you ran in here looking for Rosa like a lunatic? And she's fine, by the way.
Mateo: Yeah, she's fine. She's fine. It was nothing.
Hayley: So I should just chalk this all up to you wanting this day to be perfect, right?
Mateo: Yeah. Where's the baby?
Hayley: With your mother. And here they are.

Isabella: Mijo, Hayley told me that you were going to make a speech?
Mateo: Yeah. Just a little one. Where's Max? Shh.
Hayley: Aw, it's ok, baby. Oh, sweetheart.
Mateo: Hey, guys. Can I have your attention, please?
Mateo: Hayley, Max, and I would like to thank all you guys for being here and helping us introduce Lorenzo Hector Santos into our lives.
Mateo: I just -- well, family's everything. And, you know, I was born into a beautiful one. And a beautiful one I've made. That's all. Thanks.

Mateo: Was I lame? I'm sorry. Was I lame?
Hayley: No, you were beautiful. I know you were nervous, but you were beautiful.

Laura: You know, today is our 3-month anniversary, Baby.
Leo: I know.

Greenlee: Another toast! To Leo and Laura on reaching their 3-month anniversary, today.

Erica: Well, since we're making toasts that have absolutely nothing to do with the wonderful reason that we're here to celebrate, I'd like to add mine.
Bianca: Oh, I can't look.
Erica: Greenlee Smythe, who has just made such a sweet and magnanimous gesture in her toast to her old flame and his new wife --
Greenlee: Oh, no.
Jake: There's that word again, "magnanimous."
Erica: Greenlee has just been promoted at Enchantment Enterprises by me, and she has already delivered just a really wonderful and dynamic new ad campaign.
Edmund: Gee, this is appropriate.
Greenlee: Is she really doing this?
Jake: Looks that way.
Erica: Now, I have just come from the office, and I happen to have with me a mockup of that new ad campaign.
Hayley: She just so happens?
Marian: Is this for real?
Erica: And here it is. "I'll get him back. No one can stop me. Enchant him." And you are all the first to see it.
Erica: Congratulations, Greenlee. Now we all know that you will stop at nothing to get what you want. So, what do you all think? Ok, then. Great. Ok, then I'm going to turn this celebration back to Hayley and Mateo's beautiful baby. And I thank you all for your attention.

Hayley: I guess it really ain't a party in this town until somebody does something so weird and strange, even if it is at my son's christening.
Mateo: I guess.

Bianca: My mother is on a roll.
Rosa: Bianca, was that weird for you?
Bianca: Rosa, my whole life is weird. Thank you for asking.

Leo: What the hell was that?
Laura: Did you know anything about this?
Leo: Are you serious?
Laura: I'm sorry. It's just -- forget it.

Greenlee: Are you trying to drive me slowly insane?
Erica: Well, now, Greenlee, I just saw an opportunity and I seized it. You could learn from me.
Greenlee: I could learn from never trusting you with anything.
Erica: Greenlee, I just gave you a hill of free publicity.
Greenlee: I don't want publicity. I just want to do my job.
Erica: Oh, please.
Greenlee: Where did you get that picture of me, anyway? It's creeping me out.
Erica: Oh, Greenlee, I have geniuses working for me. They can do anything with a computer.
Greenlee: You had no right.
Erica: It was your idea.
Greenlee: Not with a picture of me.
Erica: Well, I thought you'd be thrilled.
Greenlee: Thrilled? Now everyone thinks I'm some desperate loser who's still going after a married man.
Erica: Well, aren't you? I mean, still going after a married man? And look. Greenlee, look how he's looking at you. I mean, if anything, I have really furthered your cause. I mean, he's already enchanted. "Enchanted." You've really nailed it with this catch phrase, Greenlee.
Greenlee: Yeah, but that wasn't -- that campaign wasn't supposed to be about me. Or him.
Erica: Well, now he knows it is. And I mean, I think if I were you, I would just take advantage of the fruits of my labor.

Leo: I had no idea. Ok? And I told you I not interested in Greenlee. I thought you believed me.
Laura: I do, it's just she's everywhere. And now with this ad, she's going to be on buses and billboards.
Leo: Ok, but I want to be with you. All right?
Leo: You want to get out of here?
Laura: No. I'm not leaving with my tail between my legs.

Hayley: Hey, Ryan. You made it.
Ryan: Yeah, sorry I'm a little late. I didn't know what to get him, so I got him a rattle.
Hayley: Oh, well, that's so nice.
Ryan: The lady at the store said it was -- it was a really good rattle.
Hayley: Thank you. That's so thoughtful. What do you think of his christening outfit? Isn't it nice?
Ryan: Yeah. Sorry I couldn't make the ceremony.
Hayley: Oh, that's ok. His father missed half the ceremony, busy talking on his cell phone. I was going to brain him, but then I thought, isn't it wrong to beat people in the middle of a religious ceremony? I don't want to wind up in jail. Or hell.
Ryan: You look good with him.
Hayley: Really? You think?
Ryan: Yeah, I can tell you're going to be a -- you're going to be a great mom. That is so important.
Hayley: Thanks, Ryan.
Ryan: God knows a bad one could haunt you until the day you die.

Marian: You interfere with Ryan and I'm going to call Liza and tell her about it, Adam.
Adam: Are you mad? The man has done more to interfere with my life and my family than anyone else.
Marian: Just be grateful he's here and didn't go away with her.

Mateo: Where the hell have you been?
Chris: Mateo, relax. He's here.
Mateo: Who?
Chris: No one.
Mateo: Do you have any idea what I've been going through today, huh?
Chris: That Lavery -- that Lavery kid, is he a friend?
Mateo: Are you listening to me? Do you know who's been calling here?

Erica: Well. Look who the really late cat dragged in.
Bianca: Mom, can we just go home?
Erica: Yeah, in a minute, Bianca.
Bianca: No, no, Mom, I really, really want to leave.
Erica: Yes, so do I, believe me. But right now I'm in the middle of disciplining this --
Chris: Disciplining?
Erica: Incompetent --
Chris: Disciplining?
Erica: Yes, yes! Somebody has to take you to task for what you've done.
Chris: That's it. Nobody treats me like this.
Erica: Put me down!

Erica: Put me down! Hey!
Chris: There.
Erica: You have some nerve!
Chris: Look who's talking.
Erica: You can't just carry me off, slung over your shoulder like that. Are you kidding? I'm Erica --
Chris: Kane. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know. Don't you ever ream me out in public ever again. You hear me? I am not your slave.
Erica: You were supposed to pick me up. And I get a call from the police station telling me that my limousine is stolen? And you never even called me about it, not one word?
Chris: One more time for those who in Boise who didn't hear me -- I am not really your chauffeur, Sweetheart.
Erica: Oh, that's right. You're really an undercover agent --
Chris: Don't you --
Erica: Trying to bust a drug ring. Well, I'll tell you something, you listen to me. If your undercover work is anywhere near your driving, you are in big trouble, Mr. Stamp. You have taken advantage of me and of my family and of my friends.
Chris: Wait, wait, wait. What are you talking about?
Erica: You are completely incompetent.
Chris: Me? What about you? Oh, mistress of her own universe, completely blind to the world around her.
Erica: What? I beg your pardon?
Chris: You know, you had to get yourself to a party. Well, boo-freaking-hoo. You know, have you been in your cloistered little world for so long that you don't think other people have their own lives, their own tragedies, and their own crises, huh? Did you see -- did you see the look on your daughter's face back there in the club, huh? You embarrassed yourself. You embarrassed your daughter.
Erica: Give me the keys to my car.
Chris: No, no, no. You're too upset to drive right now.
Erica: You give me the keys to my car, and don't you ever go near it again.
Chris: Fine. Just try not to kill anyone.
Erica: Yeah, you try not to ever darken my doorstep again.

Vanessa: Ah. Well, I hope you two weren't too put off by that display.
Leo: We're fine, Mother.
Vanessa: Well, I mean you must be absolutely humiliated, Laura. Honestly.
Leo: She's not. Ok?
Vanessa: Well, Darling, I know how hard you're working, trying to stay on top of --
Leo: Ok, little Miss Angel of doom, go back to your corner. Go back to your corner.
Vanessa: All I want to say is, Darling, you never underestimate a scorned woman. All right, Mommy's going.
Leo: Not a moment too soon.

[Vanessa whispers to Greenlee]

Vanessa: My money's on you, Darling. So whistle if you need my help.

Vanessa: I wanted to thank you for this very lovely party. The baby is just exquisite. Bye.

Hayley: She is so frightening. Who invited her?
Ryan: No idea.
Hayley: Are you ok?
Ryan: Yeah, I'm fine. I'm fine. Something went down today, but I'm not going to lay it on you.
Hayley: You can, you know.

Adam: Whose life are you interfering in tonight, Ryan?
Hayley: Excuse me, Ryan is my guest.
Ryan: You know what? I need a drink. Excuse me.

Hayley: Way to go, Dad. Any other guests of mine that you want to insult?
Adam: No, that about does it.
Hayley: What's going on between the two of you? And don't tell me it's none of my business.

[Phone rings]

Mateo: Santos.
Man: [Distorted voice] Looks like a fun party.
Mateo: All right. Look, whomever you are, I've already contacted an agent from the FBI, all right? So if you think you're going to get to me or my family --
Man: I already have. This agent -- do you trust him with, say, your sister's life? Because your agent hasn't been doing a very good job.
Mateo: What are you talking about?
Man: Rosa is already ours.
Mateo: You stay the hell away from my sister.
Man: Check her purse, big brother.

Mateo: Come on.
Edmund: Hey.

Rosa: Why --
Mateo: Come on.

Laura: I've got to get some water to take my meds.
Leo: I'll get it.
Laura: Oh, I just don't want the whole room to watch.
Leo: Ok.
Laura: Ok.

Greenlee: Jake, I know you don't want to be with me anymore.
Jake: Don't put words in my mouth, Greenlee. What I said was --
Greenlee: Jake, I don't care. I just really want to get out of here. Will you take me home?
Jake: Yeah, sure, sure. Why not? Listen -- Leo. We're just taking off.
Leo: Not so fast.
Greenlee: Leo, I had no idea Erica was going to pull that. I'm no happier about it than you are.
Leo: Oh, no? I think you love what you just did to my wife, Greenlee.

Erica: Men! I hate them all. They're all alike. And that Chris Stamp -- he knows nothing about me. Nothing.

[Tires squeal]


ON THE NEXT - - - - ALL MY CHILDREN

Hayley: What is going on?

Chris: There are some facts they have to get straight.
Jack: Well, now, isn't that insightful.
Chris: Just don't be antagonistic.

Leo: Jake, what's the big secret?

Greenlee: Laura? Is that you?





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